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10:29 - there are a lot of people in Washington right now, i heard you can’t even use your cell phone today!!!1

10:30 - ohmigod, LAW MAKERS ARE STARTING TO ARRIVE AND SO IS THE QUEEN OF SOUL.

10:35 - maybe they should move this to August since it’s so cold, shut up Virgina.

10:38 - 2000/min status updates on facebook shown on cnn.com!

BRB.

10:49 - someone just got into a car.

10:50 - Gabriel Luis Moreno is OLIVIA!!!!!

10:50 - Lorrie Lynn King is crying.

10:50 - Aureliano Rey Aguilar is bored.

11:02 - HOLY CRAP I CAN SEE HIM RIGHT NOW, HE’S WALKING INTO A BUILDING. I WONDER WHAT HE IS THINKING ABOUT?

11:05 - James W. Lawrence thinks Michelle Obama needs the name of good hairdresser.

11:06 - YO DISS!

11:09 - Dustin Clark it ManBearPig, im super cereal.

11:28 - the kidz are here.

11:35 - oh c’monnnnnnnn, let’s get this show on the road.

11:40 - JOSEPH R. BIDEN JR. BATTLES.

11:45 - oh hey, obama is outside now. he’s looks like a pretty huge babe.

11:49 - Jane Maru saddleback church, nice name.

11:53 - Robert Rahardja fat dude is not praying.. Haha.

11:54 - ARETHA IS GONNA SING I WILL SURVIVE! fab bow, girl.

11:58 - “I take his obligation freely, and I will well and faithfully say that the Girlettes are the best band known to man and will win at least every Oscar this year” - says Biden.

12:00 - YO, TOTAL GUY ON GUY ACTION!

12:03 - it’s happening!

12:04 - he spoke too soon.

12:06 - OBAMA IS GONNA GET LAAAAAAAAAAAID TONIGHT.

12:11 - HE’s TALKING and then some other old guy walked behind him and then walked away.

12:12 - Riti doesn’t know who all these other people are. She should a grow a brain.

12:13 - kbye. ttyn.

GRAVE DIGGER YOU ROCK

18 potential besties, 16 weeks of dramz and challenges, 2 BFFz left. Holy god i love this show.

They just want to be her bff.

9:00 - homegirl doesn’t fit into jeans Paris’ friend was trying to sell. yuck.

9:01 - finding new bff is one of the biggest challenges Paris will ever have to face.

9:05 - omg we’re going to NYC. The east coast is so epic.

INCOMING PARIS TEXT!

9:10 - Britney is getting a chance to prove her BFF qualities, lame wad face got car sick in the air. Asking where to put her barf. Riding in helicopters and getting car sick isn’t for everyone, BUT SHOPPING IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111

9:18 - Full moon…you know what that means - Vanessa is going to grow hair out of her neck (says Britney). But the real question is, is she here for Paris or her career?

9:22 - another helicopter ride, other girl didn’t barf. 10 points.

BE-FRI RINGS!!!!

9:31 - Seriously, Paris hates when someone has to talk all the time. They had BFF massages, it was better than 20,000,000 Christmas times.

9:35 - BFF mansion is so empty now and you just know that it is really time to step it up. Choose your words carefully. Final speeches.

9:40 - 20 min elimination round - fuck. I hope Britney wins. Vanessa is too much of a fan and really doesn’t understand Paris. She’d get annoying, but Britney may leave Paris for a record deal.

9:45 - Britney - Supports the bail out plan. She says she has the balls to really say no to the big wigs and that only true BFFs will do that. Talked some shit about Vanessa….made her look real bad.

9:46 - Vanessa - she’s from Alaska. Crying so much

9:48 - COME ON TELL US WHO THE BFF IS!!!!!!!!1 IT’S TOO HARD? SHE’S CAN’T DO THIS RIGHT NOW? SHE WALKED OUT?? EXCUZ?? The producer looks pissed.

INCOMING PARIS TEXT!!!! She sent it to Britney… likes her better.

9:52 - both in different cars - one being sent to a huge jam, the other to an alley to discover her fate. This has gotten kind of weird. WAIT, THE ONE AT THE JAM LOST! NO…WHAT. They have masks on. YESSS SHE PICKED BRITNEY!

kbye, ttyn.

“I think I am going to find my husband here tonight,” Claire Richardson said as we walked up to Ribfest. Claire always says what everyone is thinking but is too scared to say. The 9th annual Toronto Ribfest was held from June 27th-July 1st at Centennial Park in Etobicoke. It’s got everything one could ever dream of: ribs, music, candy, freakshows, pizza ears (?!), cornbread, and husband material. Ribbers come from all parts of the world to showcase their award winning ribs and Etobians come from Lakeshore to Rexdale to eat them. One thing I learned when rib-feasting is you first have to scope out your options before you commit. If you get too excited and pick some unknown ribs without doing your research, your weekend is ruined. All the rib tents are set up with signs repping their name (i.e – Bone Daddy’s) and their accomplishments (i.e – Best Ribs in the South 2006). Their trophies are also on display. I think that’s how you’re supposed to pick where to eat… the more pigs on top of the trophies means the better the ribs. Thus, I chose Rib King from Spartanburg, South Carolina for their impressive track record. AND for only $10, you get ribs, beans, slaw and cornbread. To say I had died and gone to rib heaven is an understatement. But there is much more to Ribfest than ribs and pizza ears. Everyone’s favourite rides are there: Berry Go Round, The Cobra, and G-force. Ribfest can also be a home away from home for deep thinkers. In between discussions of Darwin’s theory of evolution and Einstein’s theory of relativity (over a Baby King Combo), I heard the question “Hey wait, do you think there is one pizza ear for each person in the world?” At the end of the night, I think I had found my husband, and his name is Ribfest. I LOVE RIBFEST.