Have you ever imagined what The Sixth Sense would have been like if the little kid hadn’t been such a bitch and had tried to actually listen to all the dead people? Maybe they just needed help or something, like Mischa Barton did (hot even when far too young and vomiting).
Well Ghost Town does [...]

OH MY GOD! DID YOU SEE THAT SALE THAT URBAN OUTFITTERS WAS HAVING ON BOXING DAY??? IT WAS SO FUCKING INCREDIBLY AWESOME! $14 RUBBER DUCKS WITH DEVIL HORNS! 50% OFF UGLY KNITTED GLOVES!
Well I saw it, and I stayed away from it and other such sales. You probably didn’t though, and that’s why you’ll need [...]

Two Thousand And Eight was another fantastic and shitty year in sports. There were moments that absolutely disgraced the profession and made me want to steal someone’s copy of Twilight and get addicted*, and there were moments that truly gave me that boner everyone else would get if they understood what WHIP is in baseball. [...]

Vagin of the week
This week’s honor goes to Shaquile O’Neal, who became only the 2nd NBA player to ever miss 5,000 free throws. If you don’t know what a free throw is, its when someone on the other team touches you too hard, and you get to stand 10 feet away from the net and [...]

This is a special collector edition of the Sexy Sunday Sports Section.
This week we celebrate America and how the most popular baseball team in the world is setting the example during tough economic times by frivolously spending insane amounts of money on pitchers.
The New York Yankees have signed CC Sabathia (formerly a [...]

Vagin of the week
As if you didn’t know who it would be. This man.
This week in sports history
Today is Terrell Owens’ birthday!
UN-Coolest thing that happened this past week (still)
Raptors head coach Sam Mitchell was fired because the team is supposed to be better and it’s actually worse. Well… maybe the other teams are [...]

Say what you will about the Blue Jays. Say what you will about conglomerate empires. Say what you will about shitty customer service. Say what you will about business tycoons. Say what you will about an infamous quick temper. Say what you will about capitalism. Say what you will about expensive iPhones. Say what you [...]

Vagin of the week
OH MY GOD SOMEONE SHOT PLAXICO BURRESS AT A NIGHT CLUB! Oh wait… no no, he simply shot himself by accident in the leg (slow clap). The man with the best name in football on the best team in football found a hilarious way to potentially end his season and career. He [...]

This week in sports history
On November 22nd 1989, Kirby Puckett signed a 3-year $9,000,000 deal with the Minnesota Twins. Pocket change right? Not exactly. He became the first player to ever sign for an average salary of 3 million a year. And that was just 19 years ago. Today, A-Rod gets 27.5 million annually, an [...]

This week in sports history
I’M DRRRUNNNKKKK

Coolest thing that happened this past week
The Yankees offered CC Sabathia (CC does not stand for Canadian Club) a massive contract containing GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF ENERGY!! It’s worth like $137,000,000. Economy crisis my ass, New York. If he ends up pocketing all that cash, he will be able to make [...]

This week in sports history
It was Halloween the other day. And on that day 45 years ago, Fred the Crimedog McGriff was born in Tampa Bay. I don’t really know much about his career, but his name is awesome!
Coolest thing that happened this past week
The Phillies beat the Rays. The game lasted over [...]

Twenty-Three. That’s how many times I’ve seen the best Charlie Brown episode of all time. Once each year since I was born.
Yeah, it’s better than the Christmas episode (“oooh”-ing in unison is no longer cool, you fucks), and way better than the rest. You got Charlie with the faulty ghost costume, the Halloween party with [...]

This week in sports history
It was a Sunday morning. I went downstairs and Dad popped a tape in the VCR. He apologized for making me go to bed early the night before, and then pressed play.
“Joe has had his moments. Trying to lay off that ball, low to the outside part of the [...]

This week in sports history
On October 19th, 1873, representatives from Yale, Columbia, Princeton, and Rutgers got together and established the set of rules for intercollege American Football. That’s like 7 years after the civil war! The sport evolved and from 1920 to 1933, a few black players played in what would become the NFL, but [...]

This week in New York City sports history
On October 1st, 1961, Roger Maris hit his 61st home run of the season against the Red Sox (fittingly), breaking Babe Ruth’s single season record (although the Babe played fewer games a year). Steroids and Corked bats aside, this record still stands.
Coolest thing that happened this past week [...]

This week in sports history
September 24th, 1988 was the biggest day in Canadian Sports history. Three days later, September 27th, the IOC held a press conference announcing that Ben Johnson had tested positive for Stanozolol, an anabolic steroid, and would be stripped of his gold medal in the 100 meter sprint at the Seoul [...]

This week in sports history
On September 21, 2001, A-Rod (Alexander Rodriguez, pictured above with a purse), hit his 47th home run of the season and tied the major league record for dingers in a season by a shortstop. The record dated back to 1958, to Ernie Banks of the Cubs. You may remember Alex from [...]

Our friend Luc Doucet watches Armageddon at least twice a week. Every week. We don’t know why he does this, but he does. Then he wrote this. And I still don’t know why he does it.

10. Awesome References
The opening scene shows a dog attacking a Godzilla toy. Michael Bay did this because Godzilla was the [...]

Luc Doucet is our friend who knows about sports. While we generally find sports to be totally lame and boring, we often find ourselves entertained when Mr. Doucet is talking about them, because he is a loud mouth and kind of an asshole. Which is why we love him, and why he’s going to be [...]

While looking through clothing from my “beefy” era the other day, I came across a thick maroon t-shirt and pair of light gray shorts. I was a little perplexed at first because, you know, maroon is cool and all, but… then I realized that I had found my high school gym outfit. Ah, memories of [...]

BASEBALL STARTED. That means the Blue Jays! It also means something that isn’t the Maple Leafs!
If you’re not convinced yet, here are some things that will persuade you to give money to Rogers:
HECKLING
Last week, against Oakland, we moved down to the first row of the outfield and heckled the shit out of the [...]