Right now I’m in a parking lot in Tallahassee, Florida. There’s a terrible ska band playing inside a bar called The Engine Room. I’m in the van of good JUICEBOXdotcom friends the Flatliners, waiting, waitng, waiting for gentle release to come (read: the ska to end). Also, I am the designated driver tonight at a bar that has 50 cent PBR. So it’s obviously time for me to do some journalistizing. Which I rule at.

There’s this thing that’s happened every year in Gainesville, Florida for the past seven years called the Fest. It is the the best, most magical thing on the fucking planet. Over 250 bands and a whole army of bearded dudes descend on the town to yell their throats hoarse and drink a lake’s worth of cheap, shitty American beer. After years of dreaming the dream and failing to make the trek down to this swamptown punk mecca, I did it. It was the best time I have ever had in my life. And here are some highlights. Full reviews to come. Seriously, I’m in love.

Paint it Black played in a U-Haul. After the Bouncing Souls closing-night set on Friday (consisting entirely of pre-1995 material), Philadelphia hardcore czars Paint it Black set up a U-Haul trailer and a generator across from the venue, played for ten seconds before kids knocked over the generator and spilled gas everywhere killing the power, and then played two songs with only drums and hundreds of kids screaming all the words. It was some powerful shit. And then some cops showed up on HORSES. The end.

The Kickstand. This place makes me want to move to Florida. DIY punk as fuck community run bike shop with a BYOB, all ages venue in this concrete warehouse-thing full of bikes and Christmas lights. Everything I saw here was magic, all the kids were super nice and everyone sang and I felt like I was twelve and falling in love with music again. Holy shit, did I just write that? Brutal.

Bridge and Tunnel in Room 316. Last night, post-Leatherface, and fifty kids crowded into a hotel room in the Holiday Inn to watch Bridge and Tunnel play what might have been the best fucking thing I saw all weekend. Andrew Jackson Jihad and Porches played before, and Bomb the Music Industry! played after, and then I had a shower. It was a really nice night.

This weird industrial complex half an hour out of the city. The first night we drove out there for the Flats to play with a bevy of rumoured bands that included Shook Ones, New Mexican Disaster Squad, and Smartbomb. Then the kid with the key to the warehouse and the PA didn’t show up. But it was still a great night just driving and waiting. Then the second night we made it there just in time to see Broadway Calls cover Jawbreaker and Kid Dynamite. Worth it. Awesome. The last night the Flats played, I missed it (see above), but apparently Paul can’t even remember it. So it was obviously great.

And that’s not even the blagillion bands I saw. Stay tuned for more of me being unreasonably stoked. Tallahassee out.