Posts Tagged ‘rock’

Juicebox Recording Co. is Go

Posted on December 19, 2008 by


In an attempt to get the music we love in this city heard by more people, we have started a record label. Except we are cheap and poor, which, coupled with our youthful technological resourcefulness, means it’s an online-only, donation-based record label. It’s called Juicebox Recording Co. What’s up.

Our first release is a compilation of bands we like from Toronto. Some of the big-money shit on it includes unreleased songs from the Flatliners, Saint Alvia, This is Picture (ex-Mare), the Little Millionaires (ex-Bombs Over Providence), and the Wooden Sky. It’s really great. And is kind of all over the map genre-wise. Which we think is cool.

As for all the online/donation babble, we basically think that awesome music should be readily available to awesome people, who can then make up their own mind as to what that music is worth (monetarily) to them. We stole the whole idea from Quote Unquote Records, who rule and are so punk it kills me. Thanks, dudes.

We hope you enjoy these twenty songs and you tell all your friends all about how much fun you had downloading and listening to them. Music is so fucking great.

Enter the Recording Co. to download your own spectacular, personalized copy now.

Old Stuff | | 6 Comments »

BEST FRIDAYS: with King Khan

Posted on June 20, 2008 by

What’s Worst Mondays without a dark and villainous foil? That’s the kind of thinking that forced us to create Best Fridays. So, for all our weekend warrior brethren: Wooooo, T-G-I-F, right? Herein we hope to bookend your awful week by quizzing our previous Worst Mondays candidate about slightly more encouraging things. Every Friday!

His record came out this week! He’s still awesome! He’s still the same dude!

Best injury
I had both lungs collapse in the span of one year. The first was operated on by a student doctor (a Vermonstrous Birkenstock-wearing permed bitch) who never actually performed this before in her life and had the procedure explained to her on the telephone about 15 minutes before doing it.

She had to put a hole in my chest and run a chest tube in to pump air back into my lung. I asked her to put me out ’cause I did not want to see her put a hole in my chest. She assured me that it wasn’t painful and applied some local anesthetic. Then she stabbed me repeatedly with a scalpel and then tried to pry open the hole to fit the chest tube in. First she used her fingers and then pliers… I was screaming my ass of ’cause the local anesthetic did not work.

To add insult to injury, she put in a chest tube with a plastic bag attached to it and said I could go home! She sent me home with my mom who had a Renault 5. When we arrived at home, the tube had ripped up the insides of my lung because of the bumpy ride and I couldn’t breathe again. My mom called an ambulance and I was rushed back to the hospital. I had to get two other chest tubes ’cause the one that Dr. Death made caused so much damage. I was hospitalized for about two months after that and was spitting up prune sized scabs out of my mouth that were from the deep recesses of my lung. The only positive side to this was that I had a morphine pump with a button that I figured out could give me shots of morphine every 8 minutes. I also booked the first US tour for the Spaceshits at that time from my hospital bed completely whacked out on morphine. Just goes to show you that YOU CAN’T STOP ROCK N ROLL!!!!!

Best historical figure
Jeff Clarke from Demon’s Claws. Not only are his intials J.C. but if Jesus was a small viking overlord who could write tear-jerking ballads about going to a clinic to get genital warts removed than maybe this world would be little less fucked up and little more fur-covered and jizz-stained.

Best shirt
The best shirt I owned actually belonged to Paul Spence (guitarist of CPC Gangbangs). I stole it from him ten years ago for a job interview or a date (I can’t remember). Since then I wore it for my first album cover, at my wedding and while my first child was born (which was incidentally nine days after the wedding… hehe). If I had known how handy that shirt would be I would have stolen some pants to go with ’em.

Best thing to do with $20
Feed my kids or buy a bike off a crackhead (for my kids).

Best party trick
Skin watch is always a hit at the parties I go to. What time is it?!

Best monster
The Creature from the Black Lagoon ’cause he is a romantic as well as a hideous beast, and we both share a passion for blond women.

Best question ever asked of you in an interview. Now answer it:
Would you like some fries with that? Yes Preeeze!!!

Worst Mondays/Best Fridays | | 1 Comment »

REVIEW: Monotonix – Live in Toronto, June 14, 2008

Posted on June 17, 2008 by

Photo by Jade Maravillas

The honest truth is that I heard Body Language, the debut EP from these Israeli monsters/rockers, way before I actually had any idea who they were. It showed up on my desk with about a blagillion other records, I listened to it, and I thought it was really good. Kind of Sabbath-meets-Fugazi-meets-twenty-fuzzboxes. Good jams for the kids. As it turns out, this isn’t how most people first hear Monotonix. If I read blogs, apparently I would know this: Monotonix are basically the most insane live band since Iggy and the Stooges. Or at least, they really want to you to think that, and for most of their set, you almost do.

Hailing from Tel Aviv, these guys were in town for NXNE and played something like five shows. Which, after you’ve seen one, seems completely insane. At this, their final Toronto show of the weekend, the band packed Sneaky Dee’s, set up on the floor, and started their set by ripping the video projector off the ceiling. Legend has it these guys are banned from every venue in their hometown, which is why they’re here all the time now, and it kind of makes sense. Vocalist Ami Shalev pushed through the crowd, stole people’s beers, spit them back at confused de-beered dudes, took all the garbage from the bathroom, threw it in the air, and then ended up on top of the crowd for the set’s entire second half. The drummer also concluded the set held aloft by the crowd, and I think I was also holding up a guitar player at one point, but I didn’t have my glasses on, so who really knows. Musically, the band is a mess, but who cares? Monotonix are basically all hype and schtick, but the hype is mostly well-desereved and the schtick kicks ass. It’s not Iggy and it’s not GG, but it’s a fine fucking way to get kicked around on a Saturday night.

Hits & Misses, Live | | 1 Comment »

WORST MONDAYS: with King Khan

Posted on June 16, 2008 by

At JUICEBOX HQ, we’ve never really had a case of the Mondays because we don’t have real-people jobs. But for those feeling a bit garfield this A.M., feel free to wallow in other people’s most hated things. Every Monday!

King Khan is one of those self-made rock ‘n’ roll legends that makes you realize why playing loud music and making up fake names is totally kick-ass. He’s from Montreal, lives in Germany, and is probably cooler than you.


Khan started causing a ruckus in the mid-’90s with Montrealers Spaceshits, back when he was using the name Blacksnake and working the low-end as a bass player. Then he moved to Europe, re-christened himself King Khan, and started playing with some dude who’s been in Stevie Wonder’s backing band.

After joining back up with fellow Spaceshitter Mark Sultan, the two graced the cover of every cool magazine you know as the King Khan & BBQ Show. While kicking it with BBQ around the world as a stripped-down garage-rock duo, Khan still found time to exercise his way more bombastic demons with the Shrines, a 12-piece music-thing that basically defies genre stereotyping.

Now he’s preparing to release The Supreme Genius of King Khan and the Shrines this Tuesday on Vice Records, before going on tour and totally blowing your mind for life.

Worst day-job
I worked for a company called Mr. Grasshead. It was a Chia Pet rip-off made out of nylon stockings stuffed with sawdust and grass seeds. I had to stuff these things and then make a funny face on them. I would come home and have sawdust everywhere, even up my nose. Usually I could make, like, 30 in one hour, but I got stoned with a friend at lunch once and I only managed to make two in one hour. My boss sent me home early and the last thing she said to me as I was leaving was, “Don’t smoke so much next time!” In retrospect she was quite nice. It was Mr.Grasshead that I hated. I had one in my room for years and mushrooms started growing out of it.

Worst haircut
I got a very wide mohawk haircut at a friends house when I was in grade nine, and when my mom picked me up from his house she beat me up in the car while she was driving home. She is normally not a violent person, but she thought I must’ve been on drugs to want a haircut like that and went ape shit.

Worst subculture
Gothic Ska or Skothic… Actually, worse than that is definitely ICP.

Worst date
I took my date for dinner and dancing, but when we got back to my place I was feeling weird and couldn’t breathe so well, so I turned in. About twenty minutes later, a friend of mine bursts into my room and tells me that my date had to go to the hospital ’cause she was having some allergic reaction to something we ate at dinner. I thought I must be having the same thing so I went to the same hospital and it turned out that my lung had collapsed. So after the date we both ended up at the hospital… Me with a collapsed lung and her with an allergic reaction to PIZZA?!?! I am really happy we didn’t try to have sex after dinner, since it might have scarred us for life or maybe even killed us. The rest of what happened to me in the hospital is equally entertaining but falls under the “best injury” question. [Ed.’s note: come back on Friday to find out just what further lung-collapsing entertainment Khan has in store…]

Worst invention
Compact discs.

Worst purchase
The movie Zardoz starring Sean Connery as Burt Reynolds. It is painful to watch.

Worst way to die
Watching the film Zardoz starring Sean Connery as Burt Reynolds.

Worst Mondays/Best Fridays | | 10 Comments »


Posted on May 14, 2008 by

When we here at JUICEBOXdotcom HQ are afforded the opportunity to talk to someone really actually famous, the first thing on our minds is HOT CELEB GOSSIP. In Tiger Bop!, we cut to the bone of what it means to be a sexy celeb who loves to shop and has secerts and crushes and advice for being in high school. OMGZ.


What would a date with Iggy Pop be like?
You would dress in something very comfortable and form-fitting. You’d be well-fed and wined and listened to attentively. And then I would try to steer you into bed as quickly as possible.

Which hottie would you want to sing at your b-day party?
Pee Wee Herman.

If you could go shopping with any celeb, who would it be?
If I say Charlie Manson I’m going to get in trouble, so let’s just move along.

What’s your most embarrassing high school memory?
Not being elected class president. I’ve blocked out the most embarrassing moments. I have one, actually. The day I graduated junior high, it was in a beautiful upper-bourgeois neighborhood. I was so happy to be out of school and be free, I kind of got over excited, and as I walked with my friends through their beautiful neighborhood – I was bussed in – I opened up my loose-leaf binder, unclasped it, and flung the hundreds of pieces of paper all over the neighborhood. I instantly knew I had committed a faux pas. I had littered up this beautiful place. I think that was my first indication I wasn’t going to be one of them.

Fave celeb crush?
I don’t go for them that way. I size them up as far as how impressive they are as celebrities, but to me, a celebrity is like a salami. I’d really rather eat steak. Celebrities are poor substitutes for human beings.

Features, Tiger Bop! | | 2 Comments »

REVIEW: Foo Fighters / Against Me! / HiFi Handgrenades – Live in Toronto, March 22, 2008

Posted on March 30, 2008 by


Despite having a perfect 1:1 ratio of good albums to totally shit albums, Foo Fighters are still one of the most entertaining bands in rock ‘n’ roll. I mean, they seriously haven’t put out a listenable record since 1999. So it’s beyond my realm of understanding how Dave Grohl and co. managed to play for two-plus hours and keep me (and about a blagillion other people) enthralled without making me doubt their sincerity (or ability to run full-speed down a catwalk while playing guitar) for even a second.

After getting to this monster show to interview opening openers HiFi Handgrenades (ex-Suicide Machines, the Fags), and then being denied an actual pass to said show, we just bombed around the concourse level of the Air Canada Centre for a while before strolling purposefully past an usher to some seats that didn’t belong to us. Like kings. The HiFi’s were solid, but kind of lost in the massive, mostly-empty arena. They still faired better than Against Me!, who followed with a set of soulless, rote “punk rock” and succeeded in proving how signing to a major label and continuing to sing songs about your D.I.Y. ethics is really kind of boring when everyone knows you’re just in it for the money now. Whoops, you suck.

Then you’ve got the Foo Fighters, who have never pretended to be anything but a bombastic rock band for the entirety of their career. Sure, they’re a shitty bombastic rock band now, but they got fucking Rush to jam on stage with them at this show. I don’t even like Rush! But seriously! Anyway, there was a huge catwalk, stages at both ends of the arena, and duck-walking. It was huge and it made you feel like everyone in the world, including people who listen to shitty music, are ultimately good people, and maybe, in another life, you could all be friends. Except they paid $80 to see a band that hasn’t been good for nine years, so probably not. But good jams!

Hits & Misses, Live | | 1 Comment »